In my experience, change is rarely easy.  We are creatures of habit.  We like to get into routines.  Sometimes our routines don't seem like routines.  Having an occasional drink after work isn't really a routine...unless you do it enough times. Before you know it,  an "occasional drink" is a bottle of wine every night.  Also our habits aren't just our behavior.  Our thoughts and feelings can also be habits.  We can decide to change or things can change without our consent.  Sometimes making a change requires help and support from others.  Over the last six months or so, Margo gained a substantial amount of weight.  Who could blame her.  Her fiancé had called off the engagement because he wa

Sometimes we have stress in one area of our life but the stress remains hidden from our conscious awareness.  We may be aware of the tension in our body or the bad habits that crop up when we are stressed out (such as biting our fingernails, smoking, or eating unhealthy),  but the source of the distress remains unknown and unnamed...Then if happens.  Something trips the switch.  All the stress from this unnamed, unknown source suddenly get funneled into what just happened to appear.  It isn't really the cause because the stress was present before the incident.  The question is how to get to the true source of the stress rather following a red herring. Lisa's daughter was getting married.  I

Sometimes we can be offended by someone's behavior when they are in bad mood.  Sometimes it seems like we're getting a cold shoulder when someone doesn't return our call.  When we take things personally, it's because we focus on how it feels to us rather than considering what might be going on with them. When we focus on our feelings without any understanding of what might be going on the other side of the situation, it's easy to lose sight of what is really going on.  Once we start down that path, we can get lost in conflict and defensiveness.  We feel at odds with the other person.  The distance grows. Meredith was a very good seamstress.  She could sew just about anything and sewing has